Waiting to be Wanted

I had been in this place for a long time, so long that I learned to be ok with not being happy. Complacent, if you will, with the undetermined length of time that I would be spending floating in a haze of unsurety.  Definitely, I was aware that greener pastures existed, I was even aware of my free will to leave, yet I was stuck.

I guess there were perks, but I’d fallen into a lazy routine of this is my life right now.  At times I overflowed with ideas, only nothing was really getting done, because stagnation in one area of your life can inevitably spread like a growing infestation of mold throughout other areas of your life.  Can mold even be an infestation?  Nevertheless, there I was complacently being lazy while growing stagnated mold. (yes, I know)

You see, I prayed for peace a few years ago, and God answered my call in a very big way.  He arranged peace in the middle of torrential downpours with lightning strikes and thunder roars that shook the earth.  I held on to that peace with dear life and in my surety of Him, I fell asleep.  I would crack my eyes open with the occasional wave of disturbance, but for the most part I sailed on uncontrollable winds in peace.

But how many of you know, there is still work to do during the thunderstorm.  God gives us peace, joy, and the strength to withstand whatever comes our way, not so we can sleep, but so that we can continue on fulfilling His point and purpose.

Which brings me to my point……. I am awake now.

The waves of disturbance were alarms, nudges, and the sign that it was time to get up and DO SOMETHING!  The last wave had a voice, and I  awakened with a vision that promoted a hope to abandon ship! Finding that this rocky ship stranded out in stormy waters is nearing land, I can smell the freshness of the flowers from the shore. And of course the grass IS greener because there IS NO grass on rocky ships that are stranded in stormy waters!! There is another ship that’s outside the realm of the storm and its closer to land, but it’s kind of stretch to try to reach.

Knowing that it’s time to take a leap of faith can cause enough anxiety to cause the physical ramifications of a huge zit to grow on the side of your face!  Excitement, anxiety, being unsure and the slippery slope of fear that can sometimes creep in is enough stress to cause the zit to explode, leaving pain and a scar from doubt!  But you have to take the leap, so you say a prayer, step into faith, and then you jump!

Then comes the wait………Waiting to be wanted. Will the captain of this ship accept me onboard? It’s like being in a room full of clocks that causes every passing second to sound off, echoing the fact that you still don’t know the outcome of your decision.  Being awake and aware, seeing the vision, finding the hope to step out on faith requires patience and peace that promotes extended faith.  It’s not enough to step out on faith so that you can jump, your faith must remain throughout the journey.  The leap is just the beginning. You must define your faith, what is it that you are believing?  With seeing the outcome, the path is not always clear but your faith will guide you. God’s light will illuminate your steps, if your faith allows you to believe.

So, I jumped.  While gliding, I see myself landing on the ship that’s on its way to a promised land.  But if I slip and land in the waters or the captain refuses my presence onboard his vessel, I know God’s grace will lead me to the shore.  I do not have to wait to be wanted, His promises reign true and I belong to Him.

My inspiration:  “Oceans” lyrics by Hillsong United

“Oceans”

You call me out upon the waters

The great unknown where feet may fail

And there I find You in the mystery

In oceans deep

My faith will stand

And I will call upon Your name

And keep my eyes above the waves

When oceans rise

My soul will rest in Your embrace

For I am Yours and You are mine

Your grace abounds in deepest waters

Your sovereign hand

Will be my guide

Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me

You’ve never failed and You won’t start now

So I will call upon Your name

And keep my eyes above the waves

When oceans rise

My soul will rest in Your embrace

For I am Yours and You are mine

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders

Let me walk upon the waters

Wherever You would call me

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander

And my faith will be made stronger

In the presence of my Savior

Oh, Jesus, you’re my God!

I will call upon Your name

Keep my eyes above the waves

My soul will rest in Your embrace

I am Yours and You are mine

A Sister’s Pen

To my sister, who is feeling low

Feeling like she has no place to go

Stuck on life’s merry- go- round

that happens to be, Not so merry

My sister,

That feels trapped

Without any rays of Sun

Without any ways to

Run

Without anytime

To Stop

Knowing the world

Waits for None

To my sister,

Whose tears have

Overflowed the river’s run

Whose silk

Has been out spun

Repeating patterns

Can be undone

My heart sinks for you

Uncried tears

Causes throat clogging fears

To choke truth

From you

Leaving you speechless

Dry

Like unsweetened peaches

My heart weeps with you

Intangible defenses

Brick walled forts for the heart

Guarded by fear

Armed with bitterness

Clothed in hate

Protected by confusion

United with the loss of knowledge

Which leaves my people perished

My sister

My heart breaks for you

Cracks left by you

My love

Reaches for you

My spirit

Leaps for you

with Hope seeping through

wanting to soothe you

You’re not alone

Your journey

Is still to be honed

Time can’t be replaced

Your purpose was just misplaced

Your life

It, still has meaning

There’s time

Still remaining

Your clock has not run out

Just recharge

Your mind

Reach out

Transform

Your thoughts

to surmount

Defeat is not your end

Renewal

Comes about

Breakdown those built up walls

Your heart

Will beat again

Trust God

You’ll surely Win

Forgiveness

Will surely mend

The heartache

You’ve been forced in

All you have to do

Is Start

with God and you

My shoulder is here for you

My prayers are spoken too

With love,

You will get through

God has promises for you!

Tune-Up Tuesdays

Every certain amount of miles that I drive, I have to send my car to the dealership for an oil change and a check-up.  They check my brakes, tire tread and alignment, and whatever else they think they can get money for fixing.

Some of us go to the doctor ever so often for physicals and annual check-ups to make sure that our bodies and organs are functioning properly.

We go to church on Sunday to have our spirits nourished, to be preached happy, and sometimes condemned by any sins committed throughout the week.  But what happens in between Sundays, after we’ve danced, sung praises, and spoke from the Amen corner?

What about our minds?  Where are you going to renew your mind?  How many Monday mornings are you hitting you in the face before you realize it’s time to be tuned up?

Tune up Tuesdays is the reminder of that secret place that we go to fellowship and abide within our Father, where we go to seek His face, to seek His kingdom!  Our minds are exposed to so many things on a daily basis; our own problems, helping others with their problems, work problems, family problems, world problems, the list is endless.  But God promises peace and He is always with us.  We must acknowledge Him!  Literally, think of Him being right beside you. The question is never, “Where is God,” the question is, “Where am I?”  Because God said He will never leave us, so when we’re feeling alone, it’s because we’ve allowed our minds to be caught up in the situation and we need to renew our minds and align them with His word.

Today’s Tune Up Tuesday Scripture:  “Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer.” – Psalms 19:14

*Meditating on God’s word is a great tool that can be used to tune up the mind! 

Hurting

“Hurt people, hurt people.” – Will Bowen

So if you’re hurting, be mindful, you may be hurting others.  There’s healing for the hurt….. Peace for you unrest…..Light for the darkness…..And Love for the depth of mess that holds you hostage. There’s freedom in surrender.

Wilted Flowers Grow Beautifully Tour

I previously wrote a post, “God wants You:  Faith, Vision and Visuals”,on what creating vision boards mean to me.  There’s a spiritual journey that can be had in the process of creating vision boards and affirmation cards.  While creating goals and setting standards for you and your future are serious matters, creating vision boards with others makes a creative, fun, and inspiring atmosphere making the process not only beneficial for adults, but kids as well.  And so begins the “Wilted Flowers Grow Beautifully Tour”!

I, along with fellow iCare Global Team Members, Paris Harper and Tahlia Cummings decided to spread God’s messages of love to young ladies throughout our community.  It’s very important for us as women to understand our importance in God’s will.  He created us with purpose, as individuals, He has plans and desires for us to be prosperous in Him.  Therefore, we must understand His love for us, so that we can learn to love and respect ourselves.  We were blessed to experience our first vision board party with seven beautiful, smart, and creative young ladies.  In hopes of planting seeds of love, faith, and forgiveness, we allowed the girls to create topics that they wanted to discuss to encourage dialogue and to assist us on addressing life issues that the younger ladies have.

Also, we wanted to plant seeds of entrepreneurship within girls.  One of my most favorite awards show is Black Girls Rock, where women, young and old from all over the world, are recognized for being positive role models throughout communities everywhere. Listening to the stories of women awarded for community services, nonprofits, outreach, and many other different ways that they are affecting and changing their communities is so motivating and inspiring.  So we want to create an atmosphere for the ladies in our community that’s filled with faith, love, and motivation for them to become who God created them to be.

Here are a few of our blossoming flowers hard at work:

Picking out supplies

iCare Team Member, Talhia Cummings

A few of the young ladies working on their boards

iCare Team Member, Paris Harper teaching class

Paris’ message to the ladies:  “I want the girls to continue to meditate on the scripture, “Psalms 139:14, “We are fearfully and wonderfully made.”

 

Shurica sharing a part of her vision board

VB Volunteer, Tia Poyner creating visions

work in progress

work in progress

 

work in progress

• Sisters, Kennedy and Krystyon, both said they “….had a good time and wish it would come around again sooner!”
• Mekayla Stokley said, “I really enjoyed the girls session.  We were able to express and elaborate our belief on the questions you asked us.  I enjoyed the vision board, it helped me see my life visually planned.  Thank you for getting the girls and I together to do this!  I wish you success on your future.”

Get group of your girlfriends or your daughters and their girlfriends and lets create vision together!

You can reach me at spoyner.icare@gmail.com or 252-548-2400.

Blessings of love and light to you!

 

God wants You: Faith, Vision, & Visuals!

“And the Lord answered me, and said, Write the vision, and make it plain upon tables, that he may run that readeth it.  For the vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall speak, and not lie:  though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry” – Habakkuk 2:2-3

I was shocked to learn how many people in my community had never heard of creating vision boards.  As far as I was concerned it’s been the latest craze for a few years now.  Maybe the craze has died down now, but vision boards have even gotten its 15 minutes of fame on Oprah as the O Dream Board.  Whether it’s called a vision board, life map, or an O Dream Board, I was excited to find that the idea of writing down your vision is also divine.

Habakkuk was a prophet in the Old Testament who had been praying to God about all the evil and destruction that was going on, and he felt like God was not answering his prayers or sticking up for the righteous.  It seemed as though the sinners were prevailing and were in control of the city, and he was desperately seeking answers from God.  It’s much like our world today, it seems like those who lie and cheat are the ones who get ahead, while the people who are trying to live righteously are struggling.  God assured Habakkuk that He knew what was going on in the city.  He told Habakkuk to, “Write the vision, and make it plain upon tables….” “…the just shall live by his faith.” (Habakkuk 2:2 &4) You see, God had a plan for His people, Habakkuk just needed to have faith and continue in his purpose. Habakkuk receives God’s assurance that the just will prevail and rejoices in the Lord.

God has a vision, a gift, a purpose for each of our lives.  No matter what is going on around us, no matter what other people are doing, no matter what the situation looks like, we are to look toward the vision God has given us, we are to continue to work towards living out our purpose, and in doing so we are living by faith.  God told Habakkuk to write it down and make it plain!  The Book of Romans Chapter 12 reminds us to renew our minds and use our faith as we work the gifts that have been given to us.  Philippians tells us to have the mind of Christ.  In Jeremiah Chapter 29 God tells Jeremiah that He has thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to an expected end.” And continues on in Chapter 33, God tells Jeremiah, “Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not.”  You are not expected to already know what the vision is or what it is that you are supposed to be doing.  God wants us to call on Him, He will give us the vision and the answers that we need, we just have to step out on faith.

God shows no respect of person, the same assurance, vision, and gifts he had for the prophets in the Bible, he also has for us.  He has thoughts, vision, purpose that is specifically for you.  All we have to do is seek Him and He will give us the desires of our heart.  All you have to do is live by faith that He will do what He says He will do.

So we can start from where we are right now.  We don’t have to be well versed in the Bible or doing everything right, all we need is a heart to want to know God and fulfill His will. There are numerous tools that can be used to begin our journey transforming our minds, writing the vision, and working the purpose that God has for us.  I would like to begin to use the Vision Board and Affirmation Cards to set goals, keep God’s word at the forefront of our minds, and keep the vision visible.  Proverbs 16:3 states that we should, “Commit thy works unto the Lord, and thy thoughts shall be established.”  So even if you have no clue as to what your purpose is or what you should be doing commit to seeking His will through the many tools that are made available and He will impart His thoughts in us.  How awesome is that!  God wants a relationship with you and that relationship will empower every aspect of your life.

My vision board w/ room to add on

Step out on faith with me, write it down, and create visuals for the vision.